What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

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Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

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What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

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VITAMIN C!

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

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knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

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how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

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why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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''Today is Star Wars day :)'' ''Why's that?'' ''guess'' ''I don't know :/'' ''It's May the 4th!'' ''And?'' ''May the 4th be with you :p''

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

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What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

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A dog walks into a club. Just kidding I hit the dog with a club multiple times, killed it, and went to jail for the murder of an innocent animal.

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Your mother is so ugly it affects her self esteem.

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A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him to leave.

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What is worse than losing your phone charger... Being viciously raped by a group of angry vegans feminist mad at you for eating a burger, while walking out of Hooters.

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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