What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

what did the farmer say when he lost his red tractor?

How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

Whats the difference between cats and dogs? ....cats suck

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

Q.-What's the difference between broccoli and a dead moose? A.-Yes.

Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

Yo mama so stupid she was trying to put her M&M's in alphabetical order

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

Q: Why was the little girl not allowed to watch the pirate film? A: Due to the violent scenes and coarse language, her parents decided it was inappropriate.

What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

bangers and mash?

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

Why did Billy fall off the slide? Someone threw a refridgerator at his face.

“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

when life gives you lemons you make lemonade when life gives you a homisidle brige you clearly have done something to make life angery

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? the redneck got to him first.

What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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