How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

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A woman walked into a club. Or at least, that's what her abusive boyfriend told the police.

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why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

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Why did the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field

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A man died. What was his name? Phil. His name was Phil.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

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A fish swims up your penis...

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he was late for his uncle's funeral, which was taking place in the church across from his apartment.

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Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

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What do you do when you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath? Laugh at him

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Rape

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What's funnier than an anti-joke? Sarcasm.

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Why was the fat kid the last one to lunch? He'd had lead bricks stapled to his ankles by the skinny kids.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Violets are actually purple or white

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A bike.

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There is a bus full of puppies and babies with a plane flying above it carrying 2 tons of explosives. The Bus arrives safely at its destination.

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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