Your mom is so old that her organs are starting to slowly fail and she must be put on life support or she'll die.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

oh, brown loaf is fine, i'm on my bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

thumb_up thumb_down +8

hey its jerry hey its dj want to see my goat noooo

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a black man eating a chair. I don't know and this is highly unlikely because chairs are inedible therefore this circumstance is impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops