What do you call a orphan with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Scrood

What did the red paint say to the blue paint? They said nothing. Paints don't talk and you need to see a doctor if you answered anything else.

What do you call a red light A:soon to be green

why did dinosaurs get extinct? i don't know i was not there to see it!!!!!!!!!

What's worse than catching aids? - already having aids.

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

If a red house has red bricks, and a yellow house has yellow bricks, what colour of bricks does a greenhouse have? Greenhouses are made of glass.

What's funnier than New York City? ADAM STOCK! By Logan in South Dakota

What is black, tastes like crap, lands in a toilet, feels soft and mushy, sometimes red, blue, yellow, purple and pink, feels very heavy. eats cookies, drinks soft drink and lights fires? A fat person in a coloured suit.

Two 16 year old girls are chatting on their way to school: Girl 1 : "hey, is that a hickey on your neck? say, have you been naughty? is it Brian's mark?" Girl 2 : "That's not a hickey, it's a bruise. My dad came home drunk again last night and beat me up for no reason."

The snake had no skatebord to put johnnys refrigirator because the bettles mom had stolen the clowns purse were his parking had been for the airplane higway stop.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm bitten in half in your apple.

If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

A Jew walks into a bar. It's a bar full of Neo-Nazis.

Yo momma is so fat, her total body volume is slightly larger than a normally proportioned person of smaller mass!

Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

Do you know why this joke isn't funny. It's punchline is bad.

A blind man walks into a bar... He tragicly attracts aids and dies as the bar is shut down for health purposes

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a retarded failure

What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Be sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

Knock Knock who's there? ... who's there?!?!?! ... WHO'S THERE ?!?!?!? ... stupid kids.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your parents are dead, and so will you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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