Why did the housewife become a farmer? Because the kitchen was burned down in a horrific accident.

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

So i broke up with my girl, here her number... SIKE!! ITS THE WRONG NUMBAHHH!!!

What's the difference between a brick and a baby? One is a fundamental item used in building walls and the other is a human

What did jimmy get for dinner? Food

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

what happened to the man that got shot.... He died.. 3 secs after

What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

- Knock knock - Who's th.....AIDS

Q. What do you call a white guy with a black dick? A. Gay

Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

Why did the man eat the cat? I don't remember the punchline, but trust me it was hilarious.

A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

What's weird about four black men in a toilet? No one got shot.

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

josh roberts makes nuns hang themselves

whats sad about 4 black guy drivein off a cliff in a cadalic a wast of good cadalic

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Two men walk into a bar. An hour later another man sees them knocked out on the ground. Q: What Happened A: They walked into a BAR.

A tree falls over on an old woman. Mysteriously, the woman lifts the tree up and walks away. A man is amazed by this, so he goes and asks the woman how she managed to lift the whole tree. She tells the man that he is an idiot an walks away. Later inspecting the tree, he realizes it is a small sapling weighing no less than 10 pounds

hey i just met you and this is crazy but so

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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