Thanks I guess, I do look a lot like that anime, except my eyes are not giant and I got lips and you know about everything else is different, besides I wear blue or brown contact lenses Ohh, and in case you had not already noticed, I dye my hair brown, believe me, there is enough red in me to go around already... Nero huh? Angelo Nero? So what kind of sick parents did you really have, or do you have? This is weird, you suddenly got even more interesting Nero.

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99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

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What do you say to a black man in the morning? Good morning

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

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What's johnny's favorite bedtime story? The sound of the subway. Johnny and his father are homeless and can't afford bedtime stories

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Whats less comfortable than a metal bench? The trunk of a car when you're being abducted.

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Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

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2 persons in an elevator then, one guy says: dude! smells like your sister! and the other guy is not there

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What's a ghost's favorite color? Usually whatever their favorite color was in life.

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What's the difference between chili and a urologist? One is hot and spicy and the other analyzes urine.

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roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

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How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

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Knock, Knock Come in

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You bumder!

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Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

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why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

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How do you pick up girls in Auschwitz? With a dustpan

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What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

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I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

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Feminism

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful busness man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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