Why did the man have no friends? He mudered and ate someone in '86 and is rotting in prison.

Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry Show me your tits

How do you know to start calling a fetus a baby? If it cries when you abort it.

I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

Your momma has such a bad pancreas that it releases insulin into her bloodstream all the time. NOT just in response to glucose.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

Your momma is so ugly she gave freedy krooger nightmares!

An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

what is brown and sticky? a stick.

69

I'm shy. The last shitbender. How do you fit babies in that bowl? Get a blender.

Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

Yo mama's so poor, she doesn't have a lot of money.

Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

Why did Nico Bellec not shoot that one guy? Just joking, this is Grand Theft Auto 4 dummy.

You idiot.

Why couldn't the little girl swing? She didn't have any limbs.

What did the black man say to the fat Irish lady? Hi.

Guy One: Guess what? Guy Two: What? Guy One: I don't know, that's why I asked you.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? She had no arms

if you have 2 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 4 oranges and 1 apple in the other, what do you have? very large hands.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

you know whats better than lemonade? sex

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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