Did you hear the one about the girl who had three nipples? Neither did I.

Q: what did the poor, blind, deaf, orphan girl get for Christmas? A: cancer.

What did the worm say to the butterfly? Nothing, worms don't talk.

Q: you know whats a good movie? A: twilight.

What's clear, glass-like, and makes your brain feel like it's exploding just by smelling it? Crystal Meth

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was a recovering alcoholic who recently relapsed and drove his car through his garage. He took his anger out on his wife and kids. His wife kicked him out and filed for divorce. Conveniently, the liquor store is across the street.

What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

Q: How do you make an mail man cry? A: Take his car and run over his family.

Q: Whats blue and white and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A: A tree wearing a denim jacket.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

Why couldn't the Asian man speak in chinese? He never learned chinese

What is yellow and smells like a flower? A yellow flower :)

hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

Yo mama is so fat , she died of a heart condition

69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

Hi

Your Face... It's Beautiful.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

You know what I am gonna come up with that could potentially make me millions of dollars? An idea that could potentially make me millions of dollars.

Why couldn't little Billy fall asleep. Because Billy didn't have any counting skills to be able to coins sheep

Q: What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? A: I don't know; I was too busy trying to find my camera.

Who do you call when there is a ghost in your house? You should problably call the doctor, you may be hallucinating.

How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...