How do you make people run? When someone is behind you, hold the door open and wait.

What is bloody and has two legs? Half of a cat.

Roses are Green Violets are Black Everything's different since I took crack

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

Whats funny about a guy with no legs? I bought him a wheelchair.

What's worse than a baby falling? A baby fall in a pit of tar What did the baby say on the way down? "weeeeeee"

How do you fit 94 jews in a volkswagon? two in the front, three in the back, and 89 in the ash tray

Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

1+1=2

Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made the man who said shut up mad so he told the man to shut up.

whats dumb and small? dandruff

Why did little Jimmy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus.

How else can an Asian wear a contact lens? Too bad for them. They can;t sucks for them. Asians with small eyes EXCEPT FOR INDIANS look ugly

Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

why did the man beat his wife because he was mean

brittney griner

A mentally disabled person asked a tree, "Are you a tree?" the tree didn't say anything because it can not speak.

What are blacks scared of? The kkk

How many guys does it take to change a light bulb? Probably just one.

Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

Why did the boy jump in the van? Because his parents had just been in a terrible car accident.... There where 2 fatalities.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...