I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

A Jew walks into a bar. It's a bar full of Neo-Nazis.

AntiJoke will not let me type this so I will add some spaces. N I G G E R.

Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

Why was the little boy sad? Because he was raped.

Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she had no arms... Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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