Why would Obama like to be ahead of some guy's poll and bent over at the same time? Because being ahead in someone's poll is encouraging news for his election campaign and bending over is part of the exercise program he uses to stay in shape.

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One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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Why is Helen Keller Blind and Deaf? Because she can't drive!... oh no wait I screwed that up.

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Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? What are you doing here?

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Q) why did jimmy kick the bucket. A) Because his dad is an alcoholic and Beats him to the point of near death, so He takes his anger out by kicking anatomit Objects such as a bucket.

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Simon says.. Nothing because he's deaf.

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what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

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What do grass and cows have in common? They both say "moo" except for grass

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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Why was the black guy sitting in the back of the bus? Because there were no more seats available in the front.

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why was sally the best at hid and go seek they couldn't find her body

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what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

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A man walks into a bar... OW!!!

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's nothing else I want to say

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what's the easiest way to tell time? a clock

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Through him a survival buoy

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Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

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why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

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3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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