What did Osama Bin-Laden say on 9/11? JENGA!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless this event results in you being a vegetable.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did the older man give candy to the little kids? he was in a parade

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

thumb_up thumb_down -17

how do you finish a 30000 piece puzzle you search for cheat codes

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

If a blonde and a brunette are both falling out of a building, which one will hit the ground first? The brunette, she jumped first.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

"Grandpa, How did you know that Grandma was the one?" "When her sister dumbed me."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he got hit by a car because he wasn't aware of the dangers of not looking both ways. Bufoon

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did they make a new iphone? because individuals like to be connected to local and world wide media so they can stay in touch with all news, friends and family.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

BIble verses: (secret bible code breaker edition) 90.01: Might thy level of power rise above the scouter of Vegebles 3.14: Thy shall make use of pee 6:9 Oral interaction is good for thee. 9:6: Peter said, lordeth this is no good, then the lordet said, try 6:9 and all was good. 6.66 Calleth upon this number on thy cell to speak with the beast. 9:11 This number shall aid you when in danger if thy have a cell, but not against the fallen by and Al Caida. 8:00 Call upon thy cellphone at no cost. 5.99 Thy use of plays of station three, areth too expensive... Whoops! Amen and RIIIIIIIIIIDGE RACER! 50:50 Thy shall share equally. 6:19: Thy shall use thy wrestling moves well. 20:00 Thy shall noth uset this windows version as it sucketh.' 88:88 Thy shall create four equal snowmen for me. 12.34 Read this and thy shall learn to count til four. 7:77 The number of the luck. X:B0X: It sucketh hard. 3:60 it sucketh far more than the original 9:99 Is the number to defeateth the beast while he is resting upside down 0:13 "and samuel said, but oh lord, I am a teen now!" And the lord agreed and all was good. Ok, I got to decode my bible further, yes indeed!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the frog say when he heard his family was dead? "ribbit"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Japanese study of the stereotypical American man: Murica: Come on come on! Japanese: Uh yes? *walks toward American* Murica: Are you okay?! Japanese: Well yes I am doi.. Murica: BUSTER WOLF *Punches Japanese which smacks into the ground critically wounded. Murican: OKAAAAAAAAAAAY! *throws dirty trucker cap at Japanese man and leaves.* BEWARE OF THE TYPICAL AMERICAN! Study 2 American man, taught Japanese Discipline: Japanese: Herrow Mr.Educated American *bows* "Japanesed Murican": *Fighting Pose* " I SHALL STAIN MY HANDS, WITH YOUR BLOOD!" *Japanese people run away* Experiment fail. BEWARE EXTREMELY OF AMERICAN MAN! Nero: Nuking Japan probably created a few controversies and wrong stereotypes... After visiting the US several times, I find these manners to be of the Texan stereotype though... Educated Murican: PREDICTABO!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Three men walk into a bar, the bartender asks why are you three men in here? The men look confused and suddenly leave

thumb_up thumb_down -17

how many baby's does it take to clean paint your house red. depends on the quality of the crusher.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a man with no head? Nothing he has no ears.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Me: What day is it? Rebecca Black: Tuesday

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops