Q: If a hen-and-a-half can lay an egg-and-a-half in a day-and-a-half, how long would it take a peg-legged grasshopper to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle? A: He'd give up.

Your mama so fat That she suffers from heart disease

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

who has less of a soul then you? a ginger

What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

What you do if you poo out a slug? Eat it.

Black people stink of shite!

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

What's fat, gay, and ugly. A fat, gay, and ugly guy.

How many retards does it take to change a lightbulb?? None it is physically impossible

What do you call someone who doesn't have a soul? A ginger

Roses are red. Violets are violet. Violet is a color already.

Q. What do you say when a baby gets hit by a car? A. Lol fail

A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

whats green and dont fit? a dead epileptic.

So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

How do you create an antijoke? Story written by Danny and Patrick

Why didn't the cow go to the candy store It had diabetes poor cow :(

Roses are red. Violets are blue. You honstly thought i would cry over you? Well guess what player, You just got played too!

what do they do to dead Mexicans? skin them and make them in to wet suites.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...