What did the cat say to the human? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

so your snowboarding in the dessert and all four of your tires pop. how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house. the answer is B. 500 squids

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

knock knock whos there make up make up who hahahaha you said make a poo

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A Mormon walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Sigh... I gotta go to night class studies okay?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Yo mama is so fat, she lost in a race to a person who had less physical mass.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between you and a sick duck? I forget the rest but your mother's a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Who invented apple? God

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The verification for this post was debatable: "Which of these does not belong?" George Bush Barack Obama Bill Clinton Ronald Reagan Head of Cabbage Answers on a postcard please... [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -9

An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock Who's there? Your friend, George. Oh hi George, I'll be there in a sec.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you know when it's hot outside? When you walk oside and it's hot.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you do when you do what the do is the do for the do to do what you're doing that's done for what she did if you didn't do what not to do? ^error

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Yo momma so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A Finn, a Swede and A Norwegian went to an island. The Norwegian shot them all.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q:What did the midget say to the toll booth operator? A: Is your family dead too?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

High school is like forced anal sex, Hard, painful, and you cry your hopes and dreams at the end of it all.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

To tell the truth... Your really an abortion that grew

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, Ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

So a man walks into a bar carrying a giant clock. One of his friends asks, "Hey, whats up with the clock?" His friend then responds, "A goddamned genie gave it to me, i can't take it anymore. Here take his lamp." The man decided to rub the lamp and thinks to himself, "Gee, I'm gonna wish for 1 million dollars." The genie comes out and asks the man, "What wish could i grant you today?" The man says, "I wish i could have 1 million dollars!!" The genie replies, "As you please." All of a sudden, a studded dog collar appears. Then another, and another. Soon there were 1 million dog collars in the bar. The man yells, "WHAT IS THIS?!?! I DIDNT WISH FOR 1 MILLION COLLARS!!!" His friend then replies, "I didn't wish for a giant clock either...."

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened to the child who was rushed into hospital with a deadly disease? He pulled through. I'ts depressing to be constantly hearing sad anti jokes, so here is a nice one. The child in question lived to eighty one, had a great life and a good job. See, it's nice to read a happy anti joke!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops