A jewish man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder, the bartender asks "where'd you get that" the man replied "at a pet shop"

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Whats worse than 1 bee sting? - 2 Whats worse than 2 bee stings? - Holocaust Whats worse than the Holocaust? - 3 bee stings Now, if you are smart, you would notice that no one really alive today was in the Holocaust, therefore you can not make an accurate comparison between bee stings and the millions of Jews being killed. -SPG

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What did the gay lifeguard tell the little boy at the pool? No running!

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Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

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What's moist wet and I put my finger in it? My nose.

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Why do nascar drivers wreck Jeff gordon's bad racing Stupidity And kyle buschs great wrecking ability

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A family goes to a talent agency and performs an act. They call themselves the aristocrats

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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What's the difference between you and a polar bear? I don't hate the polar bear

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A child walks into a classroom.

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If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

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KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

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There were two chippendales in a bar - what were their nicknames? Chip and Dale

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Do You Know You Have Cancer?

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ...get back in the kitchen, I'm hungry

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Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not suzie!!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How did the dinosaur come out of the water? Wet.

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How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

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I walk into a bar...

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What's faker than Nicki Minaj's tits? Women rights.

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Why did the blonde throw her alarm clock out the window? Because it was broken.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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