What did the Albino get for Christmas? Hair dye.

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what do santa clause and a blueberry have in common they both have beards....except the blueberry

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If life hands you lemons, take them they taste good

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Tourette's, PENIS.

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whts worse than finding a worm in your apple? butt sex with the devil

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My aunt said slow and steady wins the race....... She died in a fire

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Wow! I've seen this joke before!

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your dads so fat, he makes your mom look skinny.

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An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

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why did the white guy go to a black mans yard sale? to get his stuff back

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was a recovering alcoholic who recently relapsed and drove his car through his garage. He took his anger out on his wife and kids. His wife kicked him out and filed for divorce. Conveniently, the liquor store is across the street.

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why didn't santa deliver any presents this christmas? Because he isn't real

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What did the dad say when the irresponsible goth problem child asked for a gun Yes

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Robert Muldoon: "Clever girl..." Velociraptor: "I appreciate your compliment, but I will still eat your face."

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. HAHAHAHA I have control of you I don't enjoy that picture.

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How do you catch an elephant? Dig a nice deep hole in the ground, and fill it with ashes. Next, line the outside of the hole with peas. When the elephant comes to take a pea, kick it in the ash hole.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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how do u kill a blonde: drop something shiny at the bottom of a pool how do u kill 2 blondes: but a mirror at the bottom of a pool how do u kill 3 blondes: ask which 1 of them is the prettiest and then wait 5 minuetes:)

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Why did the baby stop crying? I shot it with a 9mm pistol and put it in the microwave because it cried while I was watching Sienfeld.

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Did the owl ever reach the middle of the tootsie pop? Yes. Dreams do come true

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Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

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this joke is funny so dont read the rest even though there is no rest

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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