What's clear and wet?? Water (I think)

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and its killing his family.

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a woman gets hit by a motorcycle whose fault was it?......... the man's, he shouldn't have driven the motorcycle in the kitchen

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A family goes to a talent agency and performs an act. They call themselves the aristocrats

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JOSH BROWN STOP ADDING PEOPLES NAMES TO THE END OF YOUR TRUE STORIES!

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phone and phone charger were talking to each other suddenly a massive hand swopped down to the charger and another hand came down and grabbed the phone they both started screeming so the hand stabbed the phone with the phone charger so the phone said... ALL I DID WAS SCREEM (RANDOMZZZ) (L.W)

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why couldn't the blonde write the number eleven? She was paralyzed.

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Why did the duck cross the road? Hurricane Katrina

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So last night I was f**king my girlfriend and I flip her over and f**k her up the ass. Later we're sitting having a cigarette when she says, "you know it was pretty presumptuous of you to think you can just flip me over and f**k me up the ass." And I said, "presumptuous!? That's a pretty big word for a 5th grader."

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Q: Whats the difference between a pile of dead babys and a Ferrari? A: I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person if the Jewish religion and a pizza is a type of food.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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-Why didn't a girl cry after she fell down with her bike? -Because a handlebar pinned her lung.

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"You go, Glen Coco" -Mean Girls, 2004

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Yo mamma so fat, she's on a diet and is losing weight at a good, steady rate.

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Is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting AIDS.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Hit her over the head with a baseball bat until she has concussion

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Why did the boy engage in oral sex with the other boy. He was a hormonal homosexual.

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What's for dinner tonight? Your mom's vagina.

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You played so good! No, I played well. Okay??

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AWWWWWW YEEESSSS!!!

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why did the chicken cross the world becuase he had to go in the bathroom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops