What did the grape say to the bannana? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what do a toothbrush and an ice maker have in common? ....They're both in your house.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Sarah fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because his weekend was busy!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many black guys can fit in a minivan? Eight.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the black man almost go to jail? He rolled a 6 in monopoly, if it was a 7, he would've been sent straight to jail without passing "go"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Sally fall of the swing set? Because she got hit with a mattress

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the homeless man get for Christmas?... A warm meal, a shower, and a place to sleep courtesy of the local homeless unit.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

GONNA

thumb_up thumb_down -1

So a deaf man is listening to the radio.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first baby. Why did the third baby fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had three balls.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many babies does it take it to feed a grown man? It depends on the size of the man, how hungry he is and how big the babies are.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

there is a blonde, red head, and brunet held captive in afghanistan. The people say whats your last word to the red head, she says tornado... they turned and she escaped, they say to the brunet what is your last word, she says tsunami.. they turn and she escaped. They go to the blonde and say what is your last word, she says fire... she is then shot rapidly and she dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what does hi = good by cause person doesn't like you.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the man order a mail order Asian bride? Because he was caucasian which meant females of his race had unrealistically high expectations of a partner due to various materialistic overtones that are constantly portrayed in their medie creating a society of over entitled women who think they are owed the earth.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did the little boy say to his sibling? dat not funny!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How did the dog die? He was put down.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why was the black kid so good at basketball because he practiced a lot

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Sometimes I fantasize about having sexual relations with Oprah Winfrey. Sometimes I don't.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whatsthe difference between a pile of dead babies and a chicken? Chickens don't make me laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops