name one thing that is impossible!! A sober irishman

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles

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How do you spell "black" when you writing an african american history essay. B L A C K

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What's long and hard, and has cum in it? A cucumber

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a doctor came into the room after receiving a woman's test results for lung cancer. the woman says, "is it negative or positive doctor?" the doctor looks at the woman and says, "it's negative, congratulations."

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Your mom is so fat that she steps on the scale and sees a relatively large number compared to the rest of human society.

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why did the little girl fell off the bed? because she saw his father rape her sister after killing his mother years ago, and every time she goes to sleep, she remembers that and the images come back to haunt her

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Women's rights

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whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer

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what do you call 10 dead babys lunch

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

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Why did the black men chase the chicken ? Because it wondered out of a barn.

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whats super and the champions of europe? Leeds United

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Rape

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

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dassa

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The Police, you wife died in a car accident.

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why did the chicken cross the road ask jake darby

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Why was the African american pulled over in New Jersey? He was 17 and didn't have his red stickers.

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Did you hear about the little girl who got a bike for her birthday? Shes dying of Terminal Cancer

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yo mamma is so stupid she failed high school

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why did the black man get kicked out of the hospital? nothing was wrong with him.

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This is Nero, the guy striving a bit with the fact that he killed his mother in order to save his wife a month or so before Christmas: cathphra is Exceedingly well read, I say than you. I had a nightmare tonight, my parents where serving tomato soup, while my mother made great food (despite the fact they discovered that it was not angel dust she used, but large quantities of opiate that would have killed an elephant) But this time they served me dry tomato soup (that from packages) and a bowl of lukewarm soup. I asked: How am I supposed to mix this? They both gave me the look of "here comes a beating" I started calling my mother many things that horsehead network sensors, then my father grabbed my neck and tried to twist my head off (and in this dream, rather than in reality, he actually succeeded) but I somehow managed to remain alive. Then I yelled in english: THIS IS BECAUSE I KILLED YOU! I HAVE NO SOUL TO TAKE! Only then I realized it was a dream and woke up...You know, because my parents never spoke English so they would not have understood me... I have a broken vertebrae in my neck to prove that my father tried quite hard to break my neck in reality at least... Yeah, I am mostly over it, I killed my father when he tried to break my neck because I kept scatching my ortopedic arm while studying (real arm which my mother cut off and then proceeded to beat me up with funny story actually) Then killed my mother years later when she stabbed my girlfriend induced under what turned out to be a heavy dose of opiates, and paralgin forte (which main ingredent is... you guessed it MORE opiates).

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were belongs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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