Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

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Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

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What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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Your big dick.

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Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

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WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

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Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

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What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

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What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

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what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

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Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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