Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is red and cry's? A baby chewing on a razor blade

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats the differnce betwwen a Wheelbarrow and a sack of dead babies The wheelbarrow is not in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He wanted to live a better life in pursuit of freedom and a better job.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

You idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops