There once was a man from Nantucket, Who had an average-sized penis he only used during monogamous sex with his spouse.

two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

Allah walked into AK Bar

What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

NO I AM NEROCHAN LEFT!

What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

What did the black police officer say to the white police officer? We just got a call in. Four dead children were found in an alley behind a mall.

Your mamas so old. When she farted dust came out.

Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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