Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Dwarf Shortage

How can you tell the difference between a black guy and a white guy? skin color

What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

wat does T.J.C.S. Mean? leave an comment to answer

A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

Why was the boy crying in public with no clothes on? Because he had no clothes on in public.

Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

Why is our country going downhill? Because going uphill is harder.

What's more disturbing than finding an apple in your worm? The fact that you're eating a worm.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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