Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

A young black guy was explaining how he was raised by a single mother

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

Three blind mice go into a pub, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.

Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

If you are reading this you are a nerd

Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

a dyslexic boy prays to dog.

Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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