Whats round and bouncy? A bouncy ball

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What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? It's funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small.

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so a man walks into a bar, then the prison warden told him to calm doun.

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What is a bull like in a China Shop? Calm, because generally any bull you would find in a China shop is probably made out of porcelain.

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Why did the woman fall off her bike?? Because someone threw a fridge at her!!!!!!

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whatdumb and gay stewart price

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Whats worse the people posting real jokes on (Anti Jokes)? 911

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How did the blind man cross the road? With the use of a cane and a registered seeing eye dog

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One of my nipples is a different colour from the other two. Is this normal? The Doctor replied with the answer no and said you have cancer

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Did you hear the one about the guy who couldnt find his shoes? No? ok ill talk to someone who will get the reference

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Why can't dogs fly? Because they do not have wings.

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My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

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What do you call an African-American picking cotton and harvesting wheat. A farmer.

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BIG MAC'S

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What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

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What's black and white and red all over? The color spectrum. Along with other colors.

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Whats worse than finding an actual joke on anti-jokes? A.I.D.S.

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

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A man walks into a bar The bartender asks: What would you like to drink?

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A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

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Call me Ishmael. Or don't. Well, you can, but I'm not forcing you. You could call me Steve or Bob, it's not really that important. I'm just around here anyway to tell about a huge white dick. A whale dick. A SPERM whale dick. Never mind. Or the guy whose obsessed with it. No, it's not what it sounds like. He just wants to stab it with his harpoon. Wait, that sounds even worse. Whatever. Anyway, call me Ishmael...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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