I asked her where you were.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -40

If you just read this, You're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

What's big and messy? A big mess

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

thumb_up thumb_down +31

what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A Jew buys something that is not on sale

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What is a taco made out of? A. Various ingredients ranging from cheese to sour cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops