Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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Every first letter of an innappropriate body part is how it actually looks like: Penis, Vagina, Boobs

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

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A woman who owns a parrot leaves her home, forgetting that a plumber is scheduled to come fix her sink. A few minutes after she leaves, the plumber arrives and knocks on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink." The plumber waits for a minute and, seeing that nobody has come to the door, knocks again. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, a little more loudly, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink!" The plumber waits for a minute and bangs hard on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber screams, "IT'S...THE...PLUMBER!!! I'VE...COME...TO...FIX...THE...SIIIIIINK!!!" Just then, the plumber clutches his chest and falls dead to the ground. When the woman returns home, she sees the dead man in front of her door. She opens her door to go to her phone and asks the parrot, "who is it?" The parrot replies, "WHO IS IT?"

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what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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why did the black man drink grape kool-aid kool-aid refreshed him after a hard days work out in the field picking cotton

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

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-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

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Why do people make jokes about cancer? Oviously to get thier ass kicked!!! -BY:KOLBY HOOKS

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Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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