Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

What's Michael J Fox's favorite toy? While, a magic 8-ball might first appear to be a good guess. Let's be honest, those things really lose their luster after the first couple times. More likely it's something like a sports car or big screen television.

You sick fiend

38 studio's new game... Finance City

How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

How do Chinese parents name their children? With deep thought and consideration about a thoughtful, respectful and honorable name.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

I like my women how I like my coffee; without a penis.

What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

Brain fart

What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

What does the composer Berg lack? Schoen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...