How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

What do you say to a confused blond? You help her with her conundrum.

Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? A: It depends on how hard you throw them!!

2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

Why did Timmy's face hurt? Because there was a frog stapled to it.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

What did Hitler say to the Nazis? I have a mustache.

What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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