Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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2 * 2 * 2 * 3 * 2417

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What did the gay man die of? Obesity.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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1: Why did Suzie have no arms and no legs? 2: Why? 1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's there? 1: Not Suzie

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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Knock knock Who's there? Cow Cow who? If you really think about it, it's really now

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What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

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Ross.

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

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Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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