Doctor: I got bad news and worse news Patient: Whats the bad news? Doctor: You have 24 hours to live Patient: Whats the worse news? Doctor: Your mom died this morning

A jew walks into a church. he wishes to be touched by God.

whats the difference between sand and period blood? You cannot gargle sand.

Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS darragh hamilton

Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

What did the man say to th tiger? Nothing, a tiger is a dangerous and vicious animal. It then ripped him to pieces. Is family mourned after for a very long time till they came to grips with the death of the main income in their family. Aids

Yo Mama is so stupid, she believes in God. While her faith has absolutely nothing to do with her intelligence and in 2014 only the most bigoted and stupid people would demean people based on their religion,she does have an IQ of 65 and is therefore believed to be mentally inadequate. It's really quite sad.

2 drunk men walk out of a bar, they see a dog on the corner licking himself. One drunk says "man, I wish I could do that" The other drunk says "you might want to pet him first"

"You go, Glen Coco" -Mean Girls, 2004

Roses are red Violets are blue This font is black You smell like shit

A black man, a white man and a Jewish man all live in the same apartment block. Which is most likely to be at work? None of them, it's Sunday. [L]

Whats on my leg? A pimple. What is it doing? Releasing a white/clear puss.

Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

How did Nissan show its new car in there commircals By driving very fast and hitting fat kids $

Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

Y the girl tuch her butt she tried To get dookie

wut did the cow say to the other cow thet's get a moo shake

How did the dinosaur come out of the water? Wet.

What do you do with a baby with a broken jaw? Deepthroat.

What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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