What's sad about a pile of dead people? They didn't have life insurance.

What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

Yolo Pierre because of Etzio tickle shits faggatron and individual nut join forces to become the shit suckers

Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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