Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

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Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

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9/11 my birthday

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A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

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42

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Why did Schrödinger's Cat cross the road? It didn't

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

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how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

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A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

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What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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