Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

Did you hear about the guy that lost the whole left side of his body? Well, he's all right.

Two black guys run into a bank with guns. They place them in their pre-payed safety deposit boxes and continue on their way as they were falling behind on their schedule.

A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Though if the ladder is rickety and she needs someone to steady it for her, two.

Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

What did Aladin say to Mulan? Nothing. Although they are both Disney characters, they never appear in the same film, and therefore never communicate.

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

What's funny and looks like a fish? A clown fish

What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

Women outside of the kitchen.

Yo momma so fat that they've diagnosed her with type 2 diabetes and she has an extremely elevated risk of heart disease. You should really encourage her to try and eat better and get more exercise.

Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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