so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

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How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

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How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

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Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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meatspin.fr

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

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69.

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Person 1. Knock-knock. Person 2. Who's there? Person 1. The doctor. Person 2. The doct-- Person 1. You have cancer and have about three weeks to live.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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