A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

Why don't birds cry when they get hurt, lose a loved one, or watch opera? How the f*** should I know.

Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

guess what? bannanas

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Go to this website and this game is an antijoke to laugh at http://iamhelenkeller.com/

what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

Yo momma was so ugly that everybody died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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