What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

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what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

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a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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Why is the bowler right handed? He has no left hand.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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