What dod the boy with no arms get or christmas? Nothing he can't open them!

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Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

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What did the chubby, dirty, hobo get for Christmas? Cancer

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homosexual rights to marriage

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A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

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What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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Three black men was in a car. They were going on holiday.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

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Does an albino chameleon turn different shades of white?

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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You dropped something.... Yo lip

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why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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