How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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You are the most beautiful person in the world.

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A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

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Maths.

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What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

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A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

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How do you make a sandwich? Go into the kitchen and make a sandwich.

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What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

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"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

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How dis the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

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i think dylan is turnimg gay for amy

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Roses are red. Violets are violet.

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What did the white man say to the black man? Nice Pants

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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An anti-joke

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What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

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What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

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It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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