your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

What do you call a black man with no arms? Trustworthy.

Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

Why was the boy cold? Because he couldn't afford clothing.

Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

What is the diffrence between a jew and a mexican One is a religous practice and the other is a racial diversity

What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

What's worse than a bee sting? The holocaust What's worse then the holocaust? Two bee stings

Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

haha black people :D

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree, because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree, becuase it was dead. why did the third monkey fall out of the tree, because he thought it was a game!

A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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