Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

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So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

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Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

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What do you call a white guy pointing a gun at someone? A member of the United States Army.

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if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? Because the numerous failed attempts of crossing over the years deemed it almost impossible, therefore, chicken could no longer see the point in life.

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Three blind mice go into a pub, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.

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Do You Know You Have Cancer?

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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What happened to the gay guy? He died of aids...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops