When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

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A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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If 2 wrongs make a right and 2 rights make a wrong, then when you have 4 rights=2 wrongs, you have a true statement. If you have 8 rights = 4 wrongs, you have a verified statement.

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

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knock knock Goodbye

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Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

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i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

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roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

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knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

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I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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