Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

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"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

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Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

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why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

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why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

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a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jeff Oh hey Jeff, come on in

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Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

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One day there was 3 bears, a papa bear, a mama bear, and a baby bear. They were out swimming when suddenly a girl comes over to their house and tries to sit down. She sits on the big chair and says "too big", then she sits on the little chair and says "too small" and then sits on the medium chair and says "just right". Suddenly, the bears come back. Papa bear: "somebody has been sitting on my chair!" Baby bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair too!" Mama bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair, and she still here!" The girl says "Hi my name is Goldilocks." After about few minutes introducing each other, they ate dinner and they all had a great time.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

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What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

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a man walks into a bar, what does he say answer: oww..

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Whats worse than a bee sting? -Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? -The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? -Three bee stings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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