What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

whats worse than ur granny dying? uhhh...actually theres nothing is worse

haha black people :D

how do u stop a cat from peeing on the floor? Kill it... haha

an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

A black man walks into a store with a ski mask on... what does he do?? he buys skiis.

In my country we don't swim, we drown.

Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

A dog walks into a bar Because the door was open -Tag

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

A mexican walks out a mexican restaurant.

which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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