Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! :)

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

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Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea. A: Tsunami victims.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

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why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

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Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

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How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

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How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

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What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

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A woman has sex with an Asian man, then a white man, and then a black man. She chooses to be in a relationship with the black man because he is prepared for the responsibilities of a relationship and the other two men, though both are well endowed, are not ready.

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A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

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My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

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Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops