Guess whats in my hand. Can you guess? A gun. Bam bam, you're dead. Haha

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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What is funnier then 25 9/11

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Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

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What happened to Bilbo? He shit his pants.

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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a man dropped a bar of soap in the shower. He immediately picked it up and finished washing himself. He then got dressed and left the gym.

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Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

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whats black and white and red all over? ...a nun in a blender

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what did one mute say to the other? Nothing.

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener.

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Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

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My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who grants them three wishes. The brunette wishes to go back home. The redhead wishes to go back home too. The blonde misses her friends, so she wishes to go back home too.

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What do you call a baby with a shadow? A shadow-baby!

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

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-Is this the Krusty Krab? -Yes, how can I help you?

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A house comes around the corner.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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