How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

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Ask me if I care. Do you care? No.

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What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

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Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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Who is yellow and cant drive straight. A man dying of lukemia

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

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Q- what's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A- you take of your shoes to jump on a trampoline

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Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

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Why did the gay man not walk straight? Because I took a jack hammer to his foot

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Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

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why was the boy sad he had a frog stapled to his face

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I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

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What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

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What has 389,236,587 arms, has rainbow colored fur, and fornicates on your front lawn? Absolutely nothing. That's pretty much physically impossible.

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What do you call an Arabic man who crashed a plane into a business building? A careless pilot whose recklessness caused him to crash into a building. His stupidity and lack of plane control skill led to a horrible accident that involved the death of thousands of innocent people and the death of many business people's office pets.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

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Why did the woman stop running? She was an escaped convict that had been on the run for twelve years and the police had finally found the place where she was hidding. Upon arriving at her house she started to open fire on the three police cars, hit two cops and killed one more. The two are fine and are going through physical therapy as they were both hit in the spine and have a difficult time performing the smallest task. The one was one called billy. Billy had died in the hospital after asking if they had got her. He died believing a lie. They never got her. She is still on the run, I lied about her stopping.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops