Q: How do you make Helen Keller cry? A: Casually remind her that she is both blind and deaf.

What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

Roses are red, yup.

A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

What do you call a black man? Rob

What happened to the man who went to a strip bar? What happens to all of us. He died.

Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

Did you hear that the actress, Reese what's-her-name, got stabbed to death? Witherspoon? No, with a knife.

What do black people and tables have in common? Nothing.

What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

A catholic priest and Jerry Sandusky walk out of an elementary school.

Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

What did the clitoris say to the labia? I'm from the hood, the clitoral hood.

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

How many elbows does a Jew have? 2

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

You know who can't stand to put up with my shit? Polio victims.

The cream, it is coming

Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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