What gets louder as it gets smaller? A man in a trash compactor.

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Who hangs out with a girl all day every day while he's dating her for 4 months and still doesn't get his wiener touched. Adam claypool

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Why wouldn't Leena sleep with Ole? Because she thought him to be a dumb, ugly, Scandinavian.

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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When Hitler was a girl she had hyjenical warts and when she got older she had beast cancer.

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Is your refrigerator running? I hope so, or else the food will go bad!

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What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

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You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

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How do you know if an elephant has been in your fridge? If it is laying in pieces around the crumbled wreckage of your house. [L]

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

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Why were the Jews stuck in Germany? Because Joseph Rosenstein and his Jewish family missed their train out of Frankfurt to go to Paris, and so they had to stay another night in their hotel.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Jewish guy walks into a bar. He owns the place.

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So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

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Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

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how man

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Elephino. It just isn't relephant.

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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Why is Wednesday a bad day? Because at some point, Monday will come around again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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