Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q. whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I dont jump on my trampoline with metal cleats.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Connor is homosexuaI

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock. Who's there? Stop fucking around I told you I was coming. I'm sorry. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down +1

knock knock who's there the police you're under arrest for the kidnapping, and murder of 12 girls you have the right to remain silent anything you say or do can and will be used against you in the court of law

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What sport was the man with one leg excelling in? Ass kicking.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you make a baby stop crying for the rest of its life? Shoot it in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

caoimhin you satan of CHRIST IM A DICIPLE OF CHRIST UNLIKE YOU

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you get a tissue to dance. You don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between a black guy and an asian. They come from different race groups.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what has 52 teeth and holds back a monster? my zipper

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats the difference between a garage full of dead babies and a garage full of money? I don't have a garage full of money

thumb_up thumb_down +1

4501 3346 1687 2292 david0209. never do this.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops