What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

why did the chicken cross the road i hate it when people ask questions they already know the answer to

What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

Why did the black guy not like oreos? because he is a very health concious person and knowes that too much of a bad thing can make you fat.

Good job, son.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

A good way to remember which one is Beavis and which one is Butthead is to remember the acronym "Baby Blues." B in baby stands for Beavis, and b in blues stands for Butthead. You're welcome.

Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? An egg.

What is the difference between a painting and Jesus? It only takes one nail to put up a painting

Yo mama so fat, when the waiter handed her the menu, she said "yes"

Why did the black man eat lucky charms? Because it was breakfast time and he was hungry.

qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

The other day I went to the holocaust museum and it was horrible No air conditioning or cold drinks

What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

a. why? b. because

The horse walks into the bar and the bartender says, "why the long face?" the horse looks at him and says, "my wife just died."

roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

flashback 2010 bears vs. packers vs. bears- why did'nt the packers want to go to soldier field? because they didnt want to pass another 6 flags!

Life's like a box of chocolates it's shit if you have diabetes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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