How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

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What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

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Your mom is so old she died

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Barack Obama.

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is

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Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

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What is green and can hurt your eyes? I don't know, but its definitely not a laser pointer.

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Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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what is 3+3= 8

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Why did the girl take a shower? Because she was dirty

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Why cant Helen Keller drive? ......because women cant drive(:

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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Why did the Japanese man fall down the stairs? He was blind and deaf and not aware of his surroundings to prevent himself from doing so.

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What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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