I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

Knock knock. Its open.

like most people my age. im 27

Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

Knock Knock Who did that?

What's red and can't speak ? A strawberry

What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

Yo momma's so ugly that she could not find another partner after the tragic death of your father

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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