Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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What is colored and looks good hanging from trees? Oranges. Get your mind out of the gutter!

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What do you give the person who has everything? A 20$ gift voucher

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Why couldn't the horse open the door? - Because it was locked...Beeeeeeeeeeeeeef Jelly

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what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

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Whats brown and ryhmes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

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What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas?? Nobody knows because he had no arms, therefore he could not open any presents.

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Beka has AIDS

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Jesse likes to jack off and lick the white stuff off of his balls and digest it

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roses are red violets are blue. they both smell like flowers

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What did enzo give courtney for her 69th birthday? A cake that looked like a pussy cat named kyle

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Why did the chair break? The person that sat in it was over weight

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

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mommy mommy! why are we pushing the car over the cliff?! the mom answers shhh youll wake your father...

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What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

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What Did The Farmer Say When He Lost His Tractor.... "Wheres My Tractor"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gait open.

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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