TWO ROADS DIVERGED IN A WOOD

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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What do you call an old widow with 12 cats? Forever alone.

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How hot was the blonde considering she was in Africa for the first time and it was 103 degrees, very

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Where's the soap?

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

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What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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How do you start a fire in the woods? Call Cole Ryder!

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What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

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Are you gay. No. Ok.

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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What do you get if you put a lepper in front of a fan A mess

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Why did the plane leave late? Because they were out of Kellogg's® Breakfast Cereal.

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I contracted AID's from a prostitute So I went out and killed 4 gay since they are the most prominent carriers of the disease I also killed a black man I kill a black man everyday

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a man dropped a bar of soap in the shower. He immediately picked it up and finished washing himself. He then got dressed and left the gym.

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the rest of the kids during recess? Tiffany is a pencil.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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