i like having monkeys lick peanut butter off my nipples

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

Why did the black man buy a watermelon..... so he can eat it.

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Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

Why couldnt the old man ski? There was no snow.

What's black, white, and red all over? An African American and Caucasian man painting a house with red paint and accidentally spilling some on themselves

Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

There was a asian jew and a black man standing at a bus stop wht do you call the Freinds

Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

What do you call a puppy with all it's legs missing? Franklin, the quadraplegic puppy.

Flowers are colors Love me

knock knock who's there funny funny who a funny joke

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

hi michael

What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

What did the boy say to the girl? I like you hi.

Why did the man cut his hair? Cause he has cancer

what's white and sticky semen

Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

Q: What is tall, white, and shaped like a house? A: a tall white man, if you break his limbs and twist them into the rectangular shape of a house.

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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