How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

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What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, This is false, Violets are purple.

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why did the boy cry after baseball practice? He was molested by his coach.

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Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

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Hi.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the food supply was scarce

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You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

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what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

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why cant fat people walk because they are fat

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What does it mean when your dog goes to the bathroom on your floor? He hasn't been very well potty trained By: robobob123

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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get it right up there, says jacob while with danni

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What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

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a guy on the street throws a boy between 2 priests

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What did the sleepy man say to his wife? I'm sleepy.

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Its a sunny day. There's a tree and a bird. What did they say to each other? --------------------------------------------------- Nothing they can't talk.

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The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

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what did the girl say after her boyfriend proposed? she said no because they've still got a lot of stuff to deal with before they even consider getting married and he seriously needs to get a job and dump his other girlfriend.

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Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

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yo mama is so fat that a kid said to her ' The White Buddha Has Returned'

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My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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