Q: What did the pony say when it had a sore throat? A: "I have throat cancer and only have six weeks to live."

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Q: There was a cinnamon bun and a cow out flying, one of them fell.. who? A: The cinnamon bun because cinnamon bun's can't fly.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

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Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

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Don't wake me up. If you wake me up then I will give you a puppy. Just wait until you fall in love with the puppy, because then i will kill it in front of you.

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the awkward moment when you have a boner on your boner

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Why did Muhammad pray to Jesus? Because he has low self esteem and didn't believe in himself.

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What do you call a dead baby in a lunchbox? It doesn't matter he won't hear you.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why did the Japanese boy drop his sushi? He was hit by a tsunami

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What did the man do when the woman broke up with him? He changed his facebook status to single.

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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

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i see trees are green, Roses are red, Violets are blue and i think to myself What a Wonderful World

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

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What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

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What's worse than the common cold? The Plague.

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What happened when the woman sent back the pair of shoes she bought on eBay? She obtained a refund from the seller under eBay's return policy.

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sky's sty

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Knock Knock Who's there? Kevin. Kevin who? Kevin Smith. Oh yes, Kevin Smith that lovely boy from just around the corner! Come on in!

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How does a black woman know she is pregnant? When she pulls her tampon out the cotton is already picked.

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Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

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How do u make a black man cry? Kill his family!

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Why was the dinosaur laughing so hard? He heard a very humorous joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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