So a man is in a car smoking weed when he forgets to crack a window so he over doses and dies. The car crashes and he kills 3 other people.

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Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

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Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

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what did the jew get for christmas? nothing Jewish people don't celebrate christmas

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

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every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

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A Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. Its good to see so much multiculturalism in a usually racist society.

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Roses are red my name is dave this poem makes no bloody sense microwave

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whats worse than a baby impaled on your lawn... the universe being consumed by a giant albino ape with over sized testicles

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Stephen Hawking can walk

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What happens when Terran Hansen has sex with a cow? Jesse Z.

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how do you get a clown off a swing i dont know but dont call suzy

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what is the worst thing a bout four black men driving a Cadillac off a cliff? they were my friends

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What's worse than a real joke on AntiJoke? The Holocaust

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theres this guy that i REALLY like but today he was putting something in my locker, it was gumbie the little green bendy thing but i didnt want it to be in my locker so i slammed my locker, except the only thing was that his pinky was in the way!!!! oh gosh i felt soooooo bad!!!! turns out he went to the hostpital and got stitches!!!!!!! that made it worse on me!!!!!! he said he was finee but i still cant let that go!!!!!

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What did the cannibal order at McDonalds? Big Mac, extra pickle, hold the mayo.

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Yogurt? You are joking right? I am having yogurt right now, do you like see trough me or something? I mean I have been told people can do that but no way!

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Screw! Screw who? Screw you.

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"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

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roses are red violets are blue i am black and so r u

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why didn't the boy go to school because he died last night

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why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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