Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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Why don't women drive more? Because statistically the man offers to drive more frequently

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Why aren't there any black flesh-colored bandages? Good question.

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Why do we oftenly see african cry for nothing? Because this is the only way they get water.

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Haikus are simple but sometimes they don't make sense refrigerator.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A blind deer.

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Q:What do you call Black Jesus ? A:Black Jesus a.w. j.p.

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Why did the baker turn off the oven? He had run out of business

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

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how do you get a blonde to stop following you? file a restraining order.

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead

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A man walks into a pole He breaks his nose And bleeds to death

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How many mathematicians does it take to count?

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what did the cripple, the cancer guy, the blonde, and the blackguy have in common they all have no reason to live

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Why did the dyslexic chicken cross the toad? Because the toad mocked his dyslexia, and the chicken does not tolerate rude bastard toads.

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why do women rip you off? Because they like money

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Q: What do you call a gay man in a... A: Keith.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Hey look, a squirrel!!

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Why couldn't the prostitute give a proper blow job..... She had no lips

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i have a christmas tree.

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i am not a pothead!!! the only time ive evr been high was springbreak last year!!! mm hmm... wat were u doin over spring break to get high? i had jaw surgery and the doctor had me on tons of painkillers

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What's black and white and nailed to the floor? A skunk that's nailed to the floor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops