What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bike

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Get Outta Here We're Closed!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If you give a mouse a cookie... ...youre ruining its natural diet. it might die.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What was pauls mum screaming? Rape

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you kill a blonde woman? Shoot her in the head

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Bill: Heydidyouknowlosersaywhat Donny: What? Bill: Loser

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

knock knock whos there guy with a gun guy with a gun who guy with a gun who just shot you dammit

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo. Boo Who? Boobies.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q:what happen to amy's baby A:it was eaten by a dingo.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" asks the bartender. "I'm a horse, it's genetic." replied the horse, confused at the bartender's infantile understanding of evolution and other species.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

When life gives you lemons you have lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

White guy: I figure she's a gold digger, my neighbor. Black guy: Did you say the N word?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Two men walk into a bar. You would think the second man would have seen it. Made by Bobbie Pummel

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What can I say, besides, the media is fighting one another now, people do have more freedom, religion is losing the grip on people, and yeah the world may be a bit grim right now, but people have chosen their own direction in life, and that is going wherever the most corrupt ones in society tell them to. And that was never different, I am not saying that you are not doing a good job, I am saying that the underground society failed, we where idealists, then we where branded criminals, without a shred of proof, I have not lost myself, and you have not lost you, why save the rest from what they enjoy?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q. Why did Steve Carell, the 40 year old virgin, fail to get laid? A. Erectile Dysfunctioning.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the girl sad? Because she was, you idiot!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A jew enters a mall.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops