how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

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How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Leaves are green, You should know all this by now...

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Cancer Cancer who? After some time and various bouts of radiation and chemotherapy, he finally lost his life to the terrible disease.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You were supposed to die 12 seconds ago....

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, 32!

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"knock knock?" ITS 2012 WE HAVE DOOR BELLS!!!

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Why can't white kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get soap in their mouths Why can't black kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get a beating until their butts turn black and blue and they'll start crying in pain

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What's the difference between a dead dog lying in the middle of the street and a dead black man lying in the middle of the street? The physical differences you would commonly expect to be between a human being and a dog.

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You're momma is so dumb, she has troubles passing her math unit and should seriously consider a math touter

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Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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That was slightly painful. I would appreciate it if you would stop such actions in the future

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Q: What is the scariest thing ever? A: Child Birth.

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How you know when dislextic

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Why did the scarecrow win the nobel prize? Cos he was out standing in his field!

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What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

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a blond girl walks into a bar

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wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

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Why did the stereo break? Cause little Johnny threw a bat at it.

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What's the difference between Futurama and One Direction? Futurama only has one bender.

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas, therefore nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops