Roses are red, Violets are blue Oh, that's good to know.

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

What rhymes with bigger and can jump really high? Tigger

knock knock whose there? my penis.

A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

a lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for directions. the Bartender takes him into a room and rapes-him

How many chickens does it take for a cow to count on Tuesday? The same reason a horse got fired for seven plus one blue red green.

What does karissas vagina taste like? Ask vantwon

Why was little Johnny sad? His parents were killed in an awful fire

How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

What's big and green and would probably kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.

what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

Why didn't the white kid go to school? Because it was Martin Luther King day.

What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

guest what i love pancakes

A priest, a Muslim and a Rabbi sit next to each other on a plane they say nothing to each other during the flight and reach their destinations safely.

for keeps?

A bartender walks up to a church and a synagogue

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? 0. There are no lights at Auschwitz.

Ever heard nobobys perfect well ill name my kid nobody therefore he will perfect

Why was the turkey killed? Because this particular turkey lived on a farm and a supermarket was paying the farmer a reasonable price to sell it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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